Sara's Sand Castle

The Quintessential Proof

With Love(for the Wife), Honestly!!!

Fours years of togetherness it is. Married for 4 years. She is such a lovely heavenly girl. She is the most beautiful of all girls I have ever seen. Oh, wait wait, this aint about that. While all I said is true, this post aint about that. I am not trying to write a post which is superficial and all praises for my significant other on this 4th wedding anniversary of ours. I wanted to honestly give it a thought, What has these 4 years done to me? Reflecting on the journey, I recall a please stride overall. Not to say, there weren’t any lows, they were there, a handful of them. For if there weren’t those lows, we would have never held on with a girt to hit the highs. 

Pressing through difficult times as a married man, I have always wondered, when Life can be so simple being single why should we complicate things by hooking on to the so called better half?. I was better off alone, nothing to commit, no one to answer to and nothing to worry about. Then I heard a myself answering the question, “Life of course is simple when alone, but don’t you want to enjoy the abundance that life has on offer?” And then I reflect, for one to cherish such a magnanimous abundance called life, doing that all alone is a bit of a challenge. To ease the process and appreciate all the dimensions it holds, we need a significant other whose thought processes are wildly varied from ours. May be that’s why Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus, if not for that, we would know only either one of the beautiful planets. Your significant other puts you out of the comfort zone, they force you to think like you have never thought before and they make you see the world with a brand new pair of eyes. Who welcomes change in this world? And which change is pleasant to handle? But just look at what you are now and what made you this, it is those changes which you hung on to, they are responsible for moulding the new you. 

My significant other showed me what Love can do, She showed me what my passion is, She showed me what I can be. From merely being something, she showed me ways of being anything what I wanted to be. Though, I can’t help it thinking, how all the time in this world would have been only mine if only I were single. But I also can’t help it but think I would have never done anything with that time if she hasn’t shown the way as to what to do with it. For all that she gave, I am not complaining, but being grateful for the new doors she opened and new life she showed. Any change, though unpleasant in the beginning, ends up making the new you whom you are proud to show of to the world. Mother of all changes, a marriage will definitely throw you out of place, bounce you off the walls and drain every bit of your energy. But trust me, end of the day, it is all worth it. It makes you a better person and brings out of you things you never knew would exist within you. 

As I look into the future, I do see bad times coming, I do see quarrels between her and me, but bigger than that I see a life of abundance with her. I can’t see myself walking alone to have my grab of that abundance, for the abundance wouldn’t have come to me in the first place if not for her. I want to share it with her, with my significant other, to relish the fruits of life and of course, with a few nudges here and there :-) 

Dedicated to all the couples who wonder if they are doing ok with their marriage (Just like us :-P) and to the singles who are wondering if they should take the dip, You Should :-)

A Perfect Partner does not just happen, it is destined!-Like you were destined for me!!!

“A Perfect Partner can never be chosen, it just happen!! - Like YOU happened for me :-)” – This was the title of my blog that I wrote exactly a year ago on my wife’s birthday. One long year has gone by… Time enough to reveal her true colours… She has showed me her true face… and it is time to modify the title of this blog:

“A Perfect Partner does not just happen, it is destined!-Like you were destined for me J”

When I used to dream how my wife should be,

 I dreamt her to be

The most beautiful being on planet earth,

The most loving creature in the universe

& The most caring soul in the multiverse.

Sounds like fantasy?

Some people on this planet are so blessed

That their life ends up being a fantasy,

I am one!

She is the most beautiful girl I have ever seen,

Not because she has a flawless skin

But because she brings out the beauty in me.

She is the most loving girl ever,

Not because I can’t live without her

But because her love makes my life worthwhile.

She is the most caring girl,

Not because she looks after me when I’m ill

But because she puts me back on my toes whenever life knocks me down.

She is with me in my tears and joy,

She is with me in my fears and ploys;

She is with me in my triumph and failure,

She is my pitfall, she is my allure.

For one who is both my sides,

Here comes a cocktail Poem;

It’s in Tamil, It’s in English,

For She is a Granule, She is Embellish.

காதல் காவியம், With Love, a Poem!!!

You let my heart stay cool, 

கோடைகால ஊற்றை போல்;

You let my heart stay free, 

நானில்லை நீ இன்றி;

உன் கடைக்கண் பார்வை ஒன்றே போதுமே,

I feel chilled out in the scorching sun of May;

When things around me turn dry and sultry,

என்றும் இதமளிக்கும் உன் காதலுக்கு நன்றி;

உன்னில் நான் என்னை கொண்டேன், 

My life stopped from being mundane;

தொலைவோம் நம்மில் நாம் நம்மை தேடி,

I’m on, babe, are you ready???

And this year that has gone by, has proved one thing for sure,

That there lies a destiny in every man’s life…

And this year that has gone by, has showed one thing so pure,

That She is my destiny and that She is my Wife!!!!!

Happy Birthday Wi-Fi ;-)

Just go out there, Just open up yourself, Just DO It

You can rhyme a tune well, probably better than a few who shout in those innumerous TV shows. But still, you are merely a spectator and that mediocre – A singer. You can tap your feet well, probably better than a few who throw their hands and legs around on those big stages. But still, you are merely a spectator and that mediocre – A Dancer. What made the big difference between you being what you are and the one on the screen…

Yes, you may be right, he exposed his talent at the right place in the right time and you, missed all those right times, mostly because of the fear of criticism. There must have been times, when your legs just itched to get to the dance floor. And what did you do? You found a reason of your legs being weak and your body being tried to stop it from pursuing its dreams.

Knowing to dance is a talent and showcasing that dance is a behavior. A talent without an appropriate behavior is as bad as not possessing that talent at all. On the other hand, an appropriate behavior with a mediocre talent, is as good as possessing that talent itself. If you have some goodies in your bag just open it and display them. Don’t let it sleep in your bag and say, the world did not recognize it. Nobody wants to unearth talent, they only want to observe it.  
If you feel like singing now, just go out there, sing your heart... If you feel like writing something, just pick up your pen, words will flow… So next time you are lying on a couch thinking “I can do this better than him” and if you want that mediocre to be thrown out, just go out there, just open up yourself, Just DO It.

A Perfect Partner can never be chosen, it just happens! - Like YOU happened for me :-)

"Marriages happen in Heaven" - A statement that was a myth of the past for me for two reasons. One, I dint believe in a concept called heaven and two, even if a heaven exists I was pretty sure a cruel thing like marriage will never happen there :-P 

Post March 5,2012; I tend to speak "FOR" the above statement. Now I believe that a Marriage is one sure thing that is worthy to happen in heaven and even if a heaven never exists, a marriage will construct that heaven for you in your daily life. This girl, Naveena, I have seen her almost all the 365 days in a year when I was a child. When my mom told me about this girl, I was like, "Wait, I never remember seeing this girl and I do not know much about her", while the actual fact was way different.  Looking back from this point of my life, I see that she was somehow connected with me one way or the other right thru and she was meant to be that ONE for me. She hapenned to be my neighbour and their compound used to be our playing grounds.We have studied in the same school, tuitions and we have even been inside the same campus knowing not we were (When I worked for CTS, CBE and she was studying at KG College which was in the same campus). Then she happens to get placed in the same CTS and then get to fall on my mom's eyes for her to take a notice of her for me. 

As Steve jobs said in his famous last speech, connecting the dots backwards will make a lot of sense in life. You will feel it all happenned in a structured manner without your conciousness. Someone sitting all above was planning her for me and me for her right from the beginning. Wherever we go, how many ever people we bump into in our lives, we will get together only with the best of choices and that choice is already made. When I was young, I used to strongly believe in Love marriages. Arranged marriage made no sense to me for the very reason that you have to insure your life with some unknown party (Risk involved is very high). I made a choice and it dint turn out to be fruitful. What seemed to be the most saddest incident in my life makes so much sense today. And it seems to be the most perfect thing that could have happenned to me. Whatever destiny has in place for you will be your most perfect combination and all that you run behind is just to prove to yourself that it is not worth it. 

I am proud that such a girl is my wife and I wanted to embark this on the most special day in her life - March 24th, her birthday (Hereafter a special day in my life too). I love you veena and I will love you the rest of my life each day as I love you for the first time :-) Hearty birthday wishes....

You hate someone? Please, please continue to do so!

Recall the name of a person whom you hate the most. Like, the very thought of him should made you fume now. Spare a minute to think about his/her personal state. The person would be someone’s loved Parent, someone’s admired Sibling, and Someone’s adored Better half.  Somehow somewhere, he is living the life of a lovable soul.  Take away is that, he/she is not really whom you think they are. It is just the illusion of what they have chosen to show you and what you have chosen to perceive of them which brings you all the hatred, resentment and the negativity you associate with them.

Now those of you who have already started thinking that this is an advice for you to start loving them as they are all basically good people, sorry friends, you are mistaken. They have taken their rights to show you what they thought you deserve to see of them and you have taken your equal rights to perceive them as you saw they were.  Just because they are loved by someone does not qualify them to be loved by you. It will be like I am propagating you to like Adolf Hitler (I already know a few of you do) because he was adorned by Eva Braun.

You are right in putting people in the place where you think they deserve best placed. It is your own right. After all, you have the freedom for that. At the same time, what we are very good at doing is, to make sure all the others with us also create such an image of the person we hate. Now that is wrong. As you took your freedom to decide, have the courtesy to let others enjoy their liberation in choosing what they think of your enemy. Putting it straight – “Mind your own business”.

By spreading a bad image, you not only steal others of their freedom but also deposit some negativity so that your image becomes that rusty one day. I hear a few voices saying, “We should warn our acquaintances of the bad we know, I am their Saviour”. Fine, you can do that, but you should not dump your thoughts in the process. Just lay the facts down and let your friend’s brain do some thinking. Already, the human brain utilizes only 10% of it’s capacity (As supported by a popular myth ;-) ) , you please do not do your part to bring that % even down.

Let your enemy be your enemy. By trying to make them others enemies, you only prove your inability of possessing enough force to fight him down single handed. You are only making situations worse for your own self.